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They Take Pleasure in Manipulating and Gaslighting Others: When Control Becomes Their Favourite Weapon

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Manipulation and gaslighting are destructive forms of psychological behaviour that can damage confidence, destroy relationships and make victims question their own reality.

Not everyone who smiles at you has good intentions. Some people are skilled at manipulating situations, twisting conversations and controlling others without making their intentions obvious.

They do not always use physical force to gain control. Sometimes, their most powerful weapons are lies, emotional pressure, intimidation, blame-shifting and psychological manipulation.

This is where gaslighting becomes particularly dangerous.

## What Is Gaslighting?

Gaslighting is a form of psychological manipulation in which someone repeatedly makes another person question their memory, perception, feelings or understanding of reality.

For example, someone may say something hurtful and later deny ever saying it. When confronted with evidence, they may accuse the other person of exaggerating, being too sensitive or imagining things.

Instead of accepting responsibility for their actions, they turn the situation around and make themselves appear innocent while portraying the victim as the problem.

## The Common Signs of Manipulative Behaviour

People who engage in manipulative behaviour may display patterns such as:

– **Denying obvious facts:** They refuse to acknowledge things they have said or done.
– **Playing the victim:** They turn every confrontation into an opportunity to gain sympathy.
– **Shifting blame:** Nothing is ever their fault; someone else is always responsible.
– **Twisting conversations:** They change the meaning of what was said to escape accountability.
– **Destroying confidence:** They constantly criticise others until those people begin doubting themselves.
– **Using emotional pressure:** They exploit guilt, fear and sympathy to get what they want.

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These behaviours can occur in romantic relationships, families, friendships, workplaces and even positions of leadership.

## Why Do Some People Manipulate Others?

The reasons vary. Some people manipulate others to maintain power, avoid accountability, protect their self-image or get what they want.

Others may have developed unhealthy communication patterns through past experiences.

However, whatever the motivation, repeatedly manipulating another person’s emotions and perception is not healthy behaviour.

Nobody has the right to control another person’s mind simply because they want to dominate a relationship.

## How Can You Protect Yourself?

The first step is recognising the behaviour.

Do not allow repeated denial, blame-shifting or emotional pressure to make you abandon your own judgement.

Establish clear boundaries, keep records of important conversations when necessary, seek support from trustworthy people and consider professional help if the situation is affecting your well-being.

Remember that walking away from a destructive relationship is sometimes an act of courage, not failure.

## The Bigger Lesson: Control Is Not Love, and Manipulation Is Not Intelligence

A healthy relationship should be built on honesty, mutual respect, communication and accountability.

Anyone who constantly needs to undermine another person’s confidence to maintain control should seriously examine their own behaviour.

You cannot build genuine trust through deception, and you cannot demand respect while repeatedly disrespecting others.

**The most dangerous form of manipulation is not always making someone believe a lie. Sometimes, it is making an innocent person feel guilty for recognising the truth.**

### What Do You Think?

Have you ever encountered someone who twists facts, plays the victim and makes you look like the bad person whenever you challenge their behaviour?

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Do you think manipulative people are aware of the psychological damage they cause, or do they simply care more about maintaining control?

Share your thoughts in the comment section.

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VIDEO: I never protested against Jonathan, I carried placard for prayer walk – Pastor Adeboye

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3 hours ago

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November 1, 2026

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The General Overseer of the Redeemed Christian Church of God, RCCG, Pastor Enoch Adeboye, has dismissed reports that he carried a placard in protest against former President Goodluck Jonathan.

Adeboye explained that the viral photograph of him carrying a placard was taken during a prayer walk and not a protest against Jonathan.

Addressing his followers in a viral video, the clergyman also recalled how he was called a wicked man by his critics.

He said: “They wrote in the papers that Adeboye is a very wicked man. After all, we know that not too long ago he carried a placard against President Goodluck Jonathan and everybody said yes.

“They brought out the picture of where I was dressed in white and green while carrying a placard, and everybody said see him.

“When I heard about it I said me carried a placard against Jonathan? Sure I carried a placard and I can’t deny that, it wasn’t a protest, it was a prayer walk.

“We wanted to pray and the CAN chairman said all churches should do a prayer walk near their churches and that’s what I did in Ebute Metta, a walk is a walk, whether prayer walk or not.

“Have you ever heard of somebody carrying a placard on a walk? I did it because the CAN president said do so.

“I remembered when I was in Nsukka in the 1960s, in those days, if you are a student of any subject at Nsukka, you are free to go any faculty and take a course or two, just for enlargement of your knowledge.

“But I carried a placard in 2020, Jonathan ceased to be president in 2015, I carried a placard five years in the second term of Buhari but it was twisted that I did what I did in 2015 and everybody swallowed it.”

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Ebola: Kaduna State government intensifies surveillance across health facilities

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4 hours ago

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November 1, 2026

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An infectious disease hospital has been activated by the Kaduna State Government, while surveillance has intensified across health facilities as part of measures to prevent and respond to a possible Ebola outbreak.

The Director of Public Health in the state Ministry of Health, Dr Sadique Abubakar, explained that the government had also strengthened community sensitisation and equipped selected hospitals with essential medical supplies.

According to Abubakar, the state had completed a readiness assessment for its Ebola Virus Disease response to identify gaps, improve coordination and strengthen its capacity to contain any possible outbreak, saying they have been intensifying public sensitisation through various media, including radio and television programmes.

Abubakar further explained, “We have also been engaging communities through our community engagement office. Our rapid response teams are active, and our public health emergency response structures are in place.”

The Director stated that the readiness assessment was aimed at evaluating the state’s preparedness and identifying areas requiring improvement, stressing that the state government has just completed a readiness assessment for the Ebola Virus Disease response in Kaduna State.

He said the assessment was conducted to evaluate preparedness, identify gaps and improve coordination so that the state can respond effectively if the need arises.

“The state has activated its infectious disease hospital in Mando, where isolation facilities have been prepared, while drugs, medical commodities and personal protective equipment have been provided. Supplies have been made available to some selected secondary healthcare facilities to enable the state to respond promptly to any suspected case.”

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On contact tracing, Abubakar said the index case had been moved out of the country, while identified contacts were being closely monitored by the relevant authorities, explaining that there were no identified contacts in Kaduna State, as the government was strengthening preparedness at all levels of the healthcare system.

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Sowore raises alarm as stolen phone is traced opposite Ekiti governor’s office

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4 hours ago

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November 1, 2026

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The African Action Congress, AAC, presidential candidate, Omoyele Sowore, has raised concerns after a phone stolen from members of his team during an attack in Ado-Ekiti was allegedly traced to a location opposite the Ekiti State Governor’s Office.

Sowore disclosed this in a post on Sunday, November 1, 2026, saying two devices taken during the attack on Friday, October 30, had been tracked to locations within the state capital.

According to him, one phone was traced to a location directly opposite the governor’s office, while the other device was located opposite Fajuyi Park in Ado-Ekiti.

He also accused the Nigeria Police Force and the Department of State Services, DSS, of failing to release CCTV footage seized from Tawakalitu Restaurant, where his team was attacked.

“This morning, we tracked two of the devices violently robbed from members of our team during the brutal attack in Ado-Ekiti on Friday, October 30, 2026, and the locations are deeply disturbing.

“One phone was traced to a location directly opposite the office of the Executive Governor of Ekiti State, while our other device was located opposite Fajuyi Park in Ado-Ekiti.

“Meanwhile, the Nigeria Police Force and the DSS have yet to release the CCTV footage seized from Tawakalitu Restaurant, where we were attacked,” he said.

“Release the CCTV footage now,” Sowore demanded.

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