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Why I assaulted my daughter, Ilebaye – Father

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Father of former Big Brother Naija All Stars winner, Ilebaye Odiniya, Emmanuel Odiniya, has broken his silence over the viral altercation involving his daughter, claiming he was provoked before allegedly assaulting her during a family confrontation.

In a voice note purportedly from Odiniya, and shared on Facebook on Sunday by Kogi-based journalist, Jeremiah Promise Enemona Ocheme, now circulating online, the father said the incident was not driven by hatred for his daughter but by frustration over what he described as her changed behaviour after winning the reality TV show.

“I want to put the records straight that what led to that incident was not that I don’t love my daughter. She is one of my best children,” he said.

He claimed he made sacrifices and mobilised support for her emergence as the winner of the BBNaija All Stars edition.

“During her time in the Big Brother Naija house, I contributed a lot. I stood by my daughter and made sure people voted for her massively. I used my influence and connections, including governors and other people, to support her until she won,” he stated.

According to him, their relationship allegedly deteriorated after her victory, accusing the reality star of becoming disrespectful and physically aggressive towards him.

“After she came out and won, she changed. Ilebaye stopped listening to me. I would book her appointments five to six times in a week and she wouldn’t give me audience. She stopped regarding me as her father,” he alleged.

The father further criticised her lifestyle, particularly her alleged cosmetic procedures.

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“I warned her against getting cosmetic surgery — face reconstruction with fillers and BBL. She’s too young for that,” he said.

Emmanuel also alleged that his daughter had physically attacked him on previous occasions.

“She has hit me twice, and I didn’t do anything to her. One day she took an AC hanger and hit me with it till blood started gushing out of my body,” he claimed.

Speaking on the latest confrontation, he alleged that the reality TV star assaulted him first before the situation escalated.

“In this recent incident, she insulted me, hit me first with a sea hanger, causing bleeding, pushed me, and then broke an electric lantern on my head,” he said.

He also accused her of neglecting him financially despite his health challenges.

“I am very sick and needed to go for medical treatment in Dubai. I called Ilebaye to help me with some money and promised to refund her. She said she didn’t have money. But I saw her video spraying bundles of naira at a colleague’s wedding,” he alleged.

The father further alleged that his daughter negatively influenced her younger brother and interfered in his marriage.

“She has also influenced her younger brother with drugs, and he was expelled from school because of it. She once advised me to divorce her mother,” he added.

Despite the accusations, Emmanuel maintained that he still loved his daughter and wanted reconciliation.

“I still love my daughter deeply. I want her to change and do better. I ask for prayers from Nigerians. The police have already intervened and settled the matter,” he said.

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PUNCH Online had earlier reported that Ilebaye, alongside members of her family, including her father and younger brothers, were hospitalised following the confrontation at their Abuja residence.

The incident became public after the reality TV star shared an emotional livestream video crying for help, sparking concern among fans and followers online.

Confirming the development, the spokesperson for the Federal Capital Territory Police Command, Josephine Adeh, disclosed that all parties involved sustained injuries and were receiving medical treatment.

“The man is in the hospital; he is sick. All of them were badly injured and are all in the hospital,” Adeh had said.

She also stated that the siblings were under police protective custody while investigations continued into the matter.

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Catholic bishops’ inconvenient truth

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Politics and religion often conflate into a toxic brew. So, it is with the storm over John Onaiyekan’s comments after the recent meeting between President Bola Tinubu and the Catholic Bishops’ Conference of Nigeria. As the waves billow and swell, the encounter opens a window into the tremors in government rather than the cardinal’s intentions.

Instead of treating the bishops’ observations as sincere moral feedback from a respected institution, some of the administration’s vocal defenders responded with personal attacks, accusing the cardinal of partisanship and abuse of clerical privilege.

That reaction was unfortunate and avoidable.

No elected government claiming democratic credentials should treat independent criticism as hostility.

Yet the ferocious responses from the Minister of the FCT, Nyesom Wike; the President’s Special Adviser on Policy Communication, Daniel Bwala; and the SSA on Media, Temitope Ajayi, suggested Onaiyekan had committed a grave offence by saying the bishops told the President Nigeria was “bleeding,” that poverty was worsening, and many were struggling under economic reforms.

The cardinal’s fault was not fabricating facts but speaking publicly about an uncomfortable conversation.

He said the President disagreed, insisting the economy was improving and reforms were laying the foundation for recovery.

The bishops, he said, neither expected agreement nor sought to embarrass the President; they were discharging a moral duty to tell him what many Nigerians could not.

That should have ended the matter. Instead, critics turned a healthy exchange into a public quarrel. Bwala questioned the cardinal’s neutrality, alleging the church supported Peter Obi in 2023.

Ajayi dismissed the bishops as offering only one perspective. Wike argued that having taken sides in a past election disqualified the cardinal from impartiality and faulted the bishops for questioning INEC’s neutrality ahead of 2027 without stronger proof.

These points merit consideration. Religious leaders, like journalists and civil society actors, should aim for fairness as credibility rests on intellectual honesty. Achievements by government should be acknowledged. But fairness works both ways.

The administration’s defenders owe Nigerians an honest engagement with the bishops’ substance rather than attempts to discredit the messengers.

Who the cardinal voted for is irrelevant to whether millions of Nigerians are suffering. Hunger and inflation do not check party membership before striking families.

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One of the weakest responses to public criticism is to attack motives while avoiding the issues raised. That strategy failed to convince many Nigerians. Therefore, it is no surprise that support for Onaiyekan flowed from across civic space.

The Northern Youth Council said he reflected lived realities; the Middle Belt Forum called the attacks unfair; the Catholic Laity Council defended the church’s pastoral duty to speak for the vulnerable.

Former governor and minister Rotimi Amaechi, himself a Catholic, reminded the Presidency that bishops have every right to criticise governments and urged responses based on evidence, not indignation.

Even Orji Kalu, APC senator and former Abia State governor, threatened to resign from the party if the bishops were insulted, noting their similar interventions across Africa.

The public backlash appears to have prompted moderation. Secretary to the Government of the Federation, George Akume, reaffirmed the administration’s respect for the Catholic Church and promised deeper consultations.

That is the mature response expected of a confident government, and it should have been the first instinct.

The episode exposes a deeper problem.

With the 2027 elections on the horizon, there is a growing tendency in official circles to interpret every criticism through a partisan lens.

Independent institutions that refuse to sing from the government’s hymn book risk being branded hostile. Such defensiveness serves neither democracy nor good governance.

Onaiyekan’s sharper point was that too many people around the President paint an overly rosy picture of the country. Whether entirely fair, the observation highlights a real danger that administrations insulated by courtiers and loyalists risk mistaking praise for patriotism.

Presidents need more than briefings, official statistics and flattering presentations. They need uncomfortable truths from independent voices including economists, labour unions, journalists, business leaders, traditional rulers and religious organisations.

Governments that refuse to listen lose touch with the people they govern. That is why criticism is not the enemy of reform; silence is.

The Tinubu administration can rightly argue it inherited an economy in deep distress and that difficult choices were necessary. Removing the petrol subsidy and liberalising the foreign exchange market were politically costly but, many economists agree, economically inevitable.

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The government has expanded fiscal space for states, created NELFUND, launched youth initiatives, and helped end the destructive cycle of prolonged ASUU strikes. These are notable achievements and deserve acknowledgement.

But governments are judged by citizens’ lived realities, not only by economic theory or improving macro indicators.

Foreign reserves have strengthened to $52 billion from about $3 billion, fiscal revenues rose to all-time highs, and the naira exchange rate has stabilised compared with the immediate post-reform shock.

Yet these gains have not delivered meaningful relief for the average Nigerian. Inflation remains punishing at over 15 per cent and above 37 per cent in at least 10 states; food and transport costs are soaring; healthcare and medication are costly; electricity tariffs and rent have escalated; small businesses struggle with high energy costs and expensive credit.

For too many families, over 70 per cent of income is spent on feeding alone. Multidimensional poverty affects 63 per cent of Nigerians, per the World Bank.

The bishops sought to communicate that reality. It cannot be dismissed by citing encouraging macro trends.

The reforms are also incomplete. A parallel foreign-exchange market persists, reflecting distortions and weak confidence.

Oil production remains below projections. Domestic refiners complain of inadequate crude supply even as the government extends Project Gazelle with a new $4.5 billion refinancing, raising concerns about future crude commitments while local refining capacity is planned to double.

External debt keeps rising, increasing exchange-rate exposure and debt-service obligations, which already consume half of revenues.

Terrorism, banditry and kidnapping continue to terrorise large swathes of the country, driving farmers from fertile lands and worsening food inflation.

Official and independent reports indicate that more than 628,000 people have been killed and over 2.2 million abducted since 2023, according to a BusinessDay report in June.

These are measurable national realities, not opposition talking points. Governments need independent voices to speak honestly about them.  No pushback can erase the fact that Nigeria is bleeding.

The Catholic Church has a long history of such moral witness. During military rule, bishops such as Olubunmi Okogie, an Emeritus Cardinal, condemned authoritarianism, corruption and human-rights abuses.

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Under democratic governments, the church continued to criticise administrations across the political spectrum over insecurity, governance failures and human suffering. Its loyalty has been to moral principles, not to any party.

Tinubu should not regard himself as uniquely persecuted, nor should his supporters mistake clerical witness for partisan politics.

Religious leaders are, firstly, citizens. They bury terrorism victims, counsel unemployed graduates, comfort widows and feed hungry families. If such leaders cannot speak about poverty, insecurity and governance, democracy becomes a farce.

Political parties are also inconsistent. Many who now defend petrol subsidy removal opposed it when it was proposed under President Goodluck Jonathan. Those who benefited from the freedom to criticise must not deny others the same liberty when roles reverse.

One of the most perilous governance tendencies is believing that criticism weakens government. On the contrary, governments make worse mistakes when they become prisoners of official optimism.

They need independent feedback to test whether policies yield intended outcomes. Economic models and official reports are necessary but insufficient; they must be complemented by honest input from labour, business, academia, the media, civil society and faith leaders. Without it, governments risk governing statistical abstractions rather than human realities.

It is encouraging that the administration now appears to be recalibrating. Akume’s pledge of deeper engagement deserves commendation.

Consultation, not confrontation, marks mature democratic leadership. The Presidency gains nothing by quarrelling with institutions focused on the country’s welfare.

Tinubu has often said he welcomes constructive criticism. He insisted that he sought the job and should not be pitied. This episode is a chance to prove it.

Labelling respected clerics as partisan for voicing uncomfortable truths suggests the administration may lack confidence in the transformative power of its own reforms. That is diminishing.

Nigeria’s problems are too serious for official defensiveness. Reform is a journey requiring constant feedback. The bishops fulfilled their civic and moral duty. The Presidency must perform its constitutional role by listening, not by silencing dissent.

Source: punchng.com

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LACK OF TRUST IN MARRIAGE

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A marriage can survive difficult times, financial struggles, and disagreements—but when trust disappears, the relationship begins to lose its foundation.

When a husband no longer trusts his wife, or a wife no longer trusts her husband, even innocent actions can become suspicious. A simple phone call becomes a question. Coming home late becomes an accusation. A private conversation becomes a source of fear and jealousy.

Lack of trust creates emotional distance.

It produces constant suspicion, arguments, insecurity, resentment, and sometimes secretive behaviour. Instead of feeling safe with each other, couples begin to feel like enemies living under the same roof.

Trust is not built by controlling your spouse, checking their phone every minute, or constantly demanding explanations. Trust is built through honesty, faithfulness, transparency, consistency, and keeping your word.

If trust has been broken, don’t pretend everything is fine. Talk about it. Admit mistakes. Forgive where possible. Set healthy boundaries. And be willing to rebuild what has been damaged.

Remember: love may bring two people together, but trust helps keep them together.

💔 Don’t allow suspicion to destroy what communication and honesty can repair.

BUILD TRUST. BE FAITHFUL. BE HONEST. PROTECT YOUR MARRIAGE.

“Wherefore putting away lying, speak every man truth with his neighbour.”
— Ephesians 4:25 (KJV)

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See also  Why Chief Obafemi Awolowo picked an Igbo man as running mate in 1979 presidential election
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LACK OF OPENNESS IN MARRIAGE

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A marriage can look beautiful on the outside and still be struggling on the inside when there is no openness between husband and wife.

When couples stop communicating honestly, keep secrets, hide their feelings, or are afraid to discuss important issues, emotional distance begins to grow. What starts as “I don’t want to cause a problem” can eventually become mistrust, resentment, loneliness, and constant misunderstanding.

Openness does not mean telling your spouse everything in a hurtful or careless way. It means creating a safe relationship where both partners can honestly talk about their feelings, concerns, mistakes, finances, expectations, struggles, and dreams without fear of unnecessary humiliation or condemnation.

A strong marriage requires:

• Honest communication — Talk about problems instead of allowing them to grow in silence.
• Trust and transparency — Avoid unnecessary secrecy that can damage confidence in the relationship.
• Active listening — Listen to understand, not simply to respond or attack.
• Emotional vulnerability — Let your spouse know when you are hurting, worried, disappointed, or afraid.
• Respect — Honesty should never become an excuse for insults, threats, or emotional abuse.
• Forgiveness — When mistakes are acknowledged, work together toward healing and restoration.

The Bible says:

“Where no counsel is, the people fall: but in the multitude of counsellors there is safety.” — Proverbs 11:14 (KJV)

And:

“Let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath.” — James 1:19 (KJV)

Marriage should be a place where two people can feel safe enough to communicate, honest enough to admit their weaknesses, and humble enough to work through their differences.

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Don’t allow silence, secrets, and suspicion to build walls between you and your spouse. Talk. Listen. Understand. Forgive. Grow together.

❤️ Openness builds trust. Trust strengthens intimacy. And healthy communication helps build a stronger marriage.

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