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Police removed me from my abusive marriage — Victoria Inyama

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What do you remember most fondly about the era of filmmaking when you were active on the movie scene?

I remember the authenticity. We were very real, down-to-earth, humble, and hungry to showcase our talents. There was no competition, no obsession with views or popularity. We just wanted to act, even when many of us didn’t fully understand what the industry entailed. We got into it with passion and truly enjoyed it. That sincerity is what I remember the most.

Many fans would love to see you on the screen again. Are you open to a comeback, or has your passion shifted completely to other things?

My passion has shifted, but if the right opportunity comes along, I would gladly step in front of the camera again. Right now, though, my focus is on psychology, wellness, and mental health; supporting people on their journeys of healing and well-being. That’s what truly drives me now.

What’s one role you played that still lives rent-free in your mind today?

I loved all my roles. Each of them was impactful in its own way. I don’t take on roles just for entertainment; they have to mean something. If I had to pick one, it would be ‘Love From Above’. It touched on domestic violence at a time when I didn’t even fully understand what domestic violence was. Life later gave that role a deeper meaning for me.

You’ve become a vocal mental health advocate and are training in therapy. What inspired you to go down that path?

I have always cared deeply about people and been curious about why we behave the way we do. Psychology gave me the tools to study and understand human behaviour. Growing up in Nigeria and later moving abroad exposed me to very different cultures, and I wanted to know: what truly shapes us?

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How do our experiences and beliefs influence our identity?

Spirituality has always been central to my life, but I also wanted to go deeper. That curiosity led me to psychology. For me, it’s not only about mental health, but about wholeness and well-being.

You’ve been living in the United Kingdom for a while. What do you miss the most about Nigeria?

I mostly miss my friends. Apart from that, not much. Nigeria feels chaotic compared to where I live now—in a quiet village in Kent. I have become accustomed to the calm here, so while I miss the people, I don’t necessarily miss the environment.

What have you learnt about identity as you navigate life abroad?

My experience has been different from many others. When I came to the UK, I stayed with my dad, who worked in the House of Commons, so I didn’t struggle with integration the way some people did. I focused on academia, which made things easier for me. That said, navigating identity abroad is complex, and sometimes there are things I prefer not to say openly for professional reasons.

How do you keep your Nigerian roots alive in your everyday life and parenting?

I speak Igbo to my children, teach them about their culture, and stay active in our family and village meetings. I am proud of my heritage. I come from a beautiful royal family, and I instill that pride in my kids. Roots give you confidence and identity. That’s why I make sure my children know who they are and where they come from.

If you could go back in time and give young Victoria one piece of advice, what would it be?

Don’t be too kind. Kindness is beautiful, but people often take advantage of it and mistake it for weakness. When you eventually push back, you’re painted as the bad person. I still remind myself to set boundaries and not be overly accommodating.

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In a world full of filters, how do you stay true to yourself on social media?

By being content. I don’t fake it. I don’t believe in “fake it till you make it”; that’s too stressful. I’m not a fashionista; I’m more focused on academics and personal growth. Education and training will take you far, not pretense.

Even my children know this. My eldest son is entrepreneurial, but I insist he gets at least a degree and a Master’s, because education gives you the foundation to manage your future. On social media, I post and move on. My work is sensitive, so I don’t get into unnecessary exchanges.

What’s your secret to staying fresh and young?

I mind my business. In the past, I tried to correct people on social media, but I learnt it wasn’t worth the backlash. Peace of mind and letting go of unnecessary stress keep me looking and feeling young.

You’ve spoken candidly about surviving abuse. How did your personal experience shape your counselling and healing?

Psychology has been instrumental in my healing. It gave me knowledge and tools to understand what I went through. My spirituality also helped, through forgiveness, gratitude, and letting go. That’s how I’ve been able to move forward.

You once said domestic violence is a norm in Nigeria. Can you elaborate?

Unfortunately, many people in Nigeria don’t recognise domestic violence for what it is. They see it as normal. I have been attacked online for speaking out because the assumption is always that the man is the abuser, when women can be perpetrators too.

Over time, I realised that society often brushes it aside. If the abuser is wealthy or influential, people excuse it. It used to hurt me deeply, but now I see how normalised it is. The mentality really needs to change.

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How did you find the strength to leave your toxic marriage?

I didn’t leave; I was removed by the police. That’s the truth. I wouldn’t have left otherwise.

What advice do you have for women trying to reclaim their voices after years of silence and domestic violence?

Move on and live your life. Improve yourself, release the pain, and don’t let the past destroy your future. In psychology, we say, “the body keeps the score.” Stress leaves marks on the mind, heart, and even physical health. Many survivors later develop illnesses because of the toll stress takes. My advice is to let go, focus on your healing, and make the best of the life you still have.

How do you balance being a mum, psychologist and a public figure all at once?

I can’t tell you exactly how I do it; I just take it one day at a time. First of all, being a mother is everything. After God, my kids come first. Having a great relationship with them is paramount, because I don’t want them to have miserable childhood memories. I make sure I’m present for all three of them. They’re young adults now, and they need guidance and direction. We are friends, but with healthy boundaries.

With my master’s in applied psychology and coaching psychology, I also support people through therapy. My style is personal because I know what it feels like to be in certain situations. Even though everyone’s experiences differ, there’s often a sense of sadness or drowning. My duty is to help lift people up.

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FAKE IT TILL YOU MAKE IT — BUT AT WHAT COST?

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In today’s world, looking successful can sometimes seem more important than actually becoming successful. From luxury cars and designer clothes to expensive holidays and flashy social media posts, the pressure to appear wealthy is influencing how many people present themselves to the world.

But behind the glamorous pictures, is everything really as it seems?

The Culture of Pretending to Be Successful

The popular expression “Fake it till you make it” is often used to encourage confidence, ambition and the courage to pursue success before you feel fully prepared.

However, there is a difference between believing in your potential and pretending to possess wealth or achievements you have not earned.

Some people borrow money to maintain expensive lifestyles. Others spend beyond their means to impress friends, family members or social media followers. Some even sacrifice their financial security simply to avoid being perceived as unsuccessful.

The result can be a dangerous cycle in which maintaining appearances becomes more important than building a stable future.

The Nigerian Perspective: When Success Becomes a Competition

In Nigeria, visible displays of wealth can attract admiration, respect and social recognition. A person who drives an expensive car, builds a magnificent house or frequently displays luxury purchases may be celebrated as someone who has made it in life.

Meanwhile, someone who works honestly, saves carefully and builds wealth gradually may receive less attention.

This raises an important question: Have we become so obsessed with the appearance of success that we have forgotten how to recognise the real thing?

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There is nothing wrong with celebrating genuine achievements or enjoying the rewards of hard work. The problem begins when people measure their worth by public approval rather than financial stability, personal growth and meaningful accomplishments.

Young people, in particular, may feel pressured to imitate lifestyles they see online without understanding the income, financial support, debt or circumstances behind those images.

Social media shows us what people want us to see. It rarely reveals the full story.

The Hidden Cost of Fake Success

The consequences of pretending to be wealthy can extend far beyond an empty bank account.

Financial pressure: Spending money you cannot afford to lose can lead to debt and financial insecurity.

Mental stress: Constantly maintaining a false image can create anxiety and fear of being exposed.

Damaged relationships: Borrowing money to impress others or lying about your circumstances can undermine trust.

Delayed progress: Money spent on appearances is money that could have gone towards education, business, savings, housing or other meaningful goals.

Real success does not always look glamorous. Sometimes, it looks like living within your means, paying your bills on time, supporting your family, learning a valuable skill and steadily improving your circumstances.

These achievements may not attract thousands of likes, but they can make a lasting difference in your life.

Confidence Is Good. Deception Is Different.

The expression “fake it till you make it” does not have to mean lying about your wealth. It can mean developing the confidence to apply for a better job, start a business, speak publicly or pursue an opportunity before you feel completely ready.

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That kind of confidence can be constructive.

But pretending to own what you do not own, borrowing recklessly to impress people or misrepresenting your financial position is a different matter.

You do not have to look rich to build wealth. You do not have to impress everybody to make progress. And you certainly do not have to prove your success to people who are not contributing to your future.

Build the life first. Let the appearance follow naturally.

The Big Question: Are We Living for Ourselves or for Other People’s Approval?

Ultimately, everyone has a choice. You can spend your life competing with other people’s carefully curated images, or you can concentrate on building a life that genuinely works for you.

The real measure of success is not simply what you wear, the car you drive or the destinations you post online. It is also the security you build, the responsibilities you fulfil, the opportunities you create and the peace of mind you enjoy.

At NewsBreak365, we want to hear your perspective.

Join the conversation:

Is “fake it till you make it” a useful strategy for developing confidence, or does it encourage people to deceive others?

In Nigerian society, do people respect genuine achievement more than visible displays of wealth?

Would you rather live modestly while building real wealth or maintain an expensive lifestyle to impress people?

Has social media made success look more like a competition than a personal journey?

Share your views in the comments. Respectful disagreement is welcome.

NewsBreak365 — News. People. Perspectives.

See also  Nelson Mandela and Nigeria’s Anti-Apartheid Role

Follow NewsBreak365 for more thought-provoking stories and discussions about society, money, culture and everyday life.

#NewsBreak365 #FakeItTillYouMakeIt #RealSuccess #NigerianSociety #FinancialLiteracy #SocialMediaPressure

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“I MADE THIS PERSON WHO THEY ARE TODAY!” — REALLY?

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In Nigeria, you sometimes hear people say, “If not for me, where would you be today?”

It could be a politician reminding constituents of the favours he claims to have done for them. It could be a wealthy businessman telling a former employee that they would still be struggling without him. It could be a family member reminding a younger relative of the school fees they paid, the business they financed, or the connections they provided.

Sometimes, even after the person has become successful, the reminder never stops.

But does helping someone succeed give you permanent ownership of their achievements?

Let’s look at the Nigerian reality.

A young Nigerian gets a job through someone’s connection. Years later, that young person builds a successful career through hard work, experience, sacrifice, and personal determination. Yet the person who introduced them to the employer continues to claim all the credit.

A young entrepreneur receives financial support from a relative and turns a small business into a thriving company. Instead of celebrating the entrepreneur’s growth, the relative repeatedly reminds everyone, “I was the one who made him rich.”

In politics, some Nigerian leaders speak as though providing roads, scholarships, appointments, or other public benefits means citizens must remain personally loyal to them. But public service is not a personal favour when it is funded by public resources.

Here is the uncomfortable question: When does gratitude become control?

Let us be fair. Many Nigerians have succeeded because someone believed in them when nobody else did. Parents sacrificed their comfort, relatives paid school fees, mentors opened doors, and friends provided support during difficult times. Those contributions should never be dismissed.

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But opening a door is not the same as walking the entire journey.

The person who helped you deserves appreciation. The person who worked hard to build a future also deserves recognition.

Nigerians must learn to distinguish between being grateful to someone and becoming permanently indebted to their ego.

If you helped someone become successful, celebrate your contribution without trying to control their decisions forever. And if someone helped you, never allow success to erase your memory or turn you into an ungrateful person.

NEWSBREAK365 ASKS:

In Nigerian society, have you noticed how some people use past favours to demand lifelong loyalty?

1️⃣ Is it right to keep reminding someone of what you did for them?

2️⃣ If you helped someone get a job or start a business, do you deserve credit for their entire success?

3️⃣ Should Nigerians remain loyal to politicians simply because those politicians once helped them?

4️⃣ Have you ever seen a relationship damaged because someone kept saying, “I made you who you are today”?

💬 Drop your opinion in the comments. Let’s have an honest discussion.

Share this post with someone who believes in gratitude—but also understands the importance of personal independence.

Follow Newsbreak365 for bold conversations about Nigerian society, politics, relationships, culture, and everyday life.

#Newsbreak365 #Nigeria #NigerianSociety #NigerianPolitics #SuccessAndGratitude #LifeLessons #SocialCommentary

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SOME PEOPLE WILL DO ANYTHING — EVEN EVIL — JUST TO MAKE MONEY!

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In Nigeria today, one question deserves serious attention: Have we reached a point where the amount of money you have matters more than how you made it?

Look around. Someone builds a mansion, buys an expensive SUV, wears designer clothes, or sprays bundles of ₦1,000 notes at parties, and suddenly, everybody wants to associate with them. They are celebrated, respected, and treated like champions—even when nobody knows the true story behind their wealth.

But why are we so quick to celebrate money without asking questions?

Millions of Nigerians wake up every morning to work honestly. Traders struggle to keep their businesses alive. Teachers work hard for their salaries. Young graduates search endlessly for jobs. Parents make sacrifices to feed their children and pay school fees. Yet, some people feel that honest work is too slow and that becoming rich by any means necessary is the only way to survive.

That is where the real danger begins.

When society celebrates wealth without integrity, some people may become tempted by internet fraud, scams, corruption, exploitation, and other harmful practices. Others may even turn to alleged ritual practices because they believe wealth must come at any cost.

The problem is not that Nigerians want to become rich. The problem is when the desperation to become rich destroys people’s conscience.

Think about the message we are sending to the younger generation. When a young person sees someone flaunting millions online and receives more admiration than a hardworking professional, what lesson are we teaching?

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Are we teaching our children to value education, creativity, patience, and honest business? Or are we teaching them that the only thing that matters is having money, regardless of its source?

At parties, we celebrate the person spraying cash. On social media, we admire the person showing off a fleet of cars. In some communities, people who suddenly become wealthy receive praise before anyone considers how that wealth was acquired.

Meanwhile, honest people who are struggling financially can be mocked, ignored, or treated as failures.

WHEN DID POVERTY BECOME A SHAME, AND WHEN DID QUESTIONABLE WEALTH BECOME A BADGE OF HONOUR?

Nigeria needs a change in values. We need to celebrate honest entrepreneurs, hardworking workers, innovative young people, and those who build successful businesses without destroying other people’s lives.

We must also stop confusing expensive possessions with genuine success. A luxury car does not prove good character. A mansion does not guarantee peace of mind. And a fat bank account does not automatically make someone a role model.

There is nothing wrong with dreaming of wealth. Nigerians deserve good jobs, profitable businesses, financial freedom, and a better quality of life. But no amount of money should be worth sacrificing your humanity, integrity, or another person’s future.

LET’S HAVE AN HONEST NIGERIAN CONVERSATION!

👇 QUESTION 1: Do you think Nigerian society celebrates wealthy people too much without asking how they made their money?

👇 QUESTION 2: Has the pressure to become rich made some young Nigerians lose sight of the value of honest work?

👇 QUESTION 3: If someone is rich but acquired their wealth through dishonest or harmful means, do they deserve to be celebrated?

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Drop your opinion in the comments. Don’t just read and scroll past—let’s discuss this important issue.

📢 Share this post. The conversation about money, morality, and success needs to happen.

Newsbreak365 — News • People • Perspectives

#Nigeria #NigerianSociety #DirtyMoney #YahooBoys #Corruption #MoneyAndMorality #NigerianYouth #HonestWealth #SocialCommentary #Newsbreak365

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