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How we waited for 31 years before having our first child – Couple

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Laundry Manager at Mountain of Fire and Miracles Ministries, Prayer City, Mrs Kemi Omotinugbon, who welcomed her first child at the age of 56 after 31 years of marriage, shares with GRACE EDEMA how she overcame the trying periods

What do you do and how old are you?

I work at MFM Prayer City as a laundry manager. I am 57 years old. I was born on July 13, 1968.

When did you get married?

I got married in 1994.

When you got married in 1994, like most couples, you probably expected to have a child within a year or two. At what point did you realise there was a challenge with getting pregnant?

We realised it was a challenge about five years into the marriage.

What did you do after discovering that?

We started by praying. After that, we sought medical treatment and saw a doctor for possible solutions.

Was there any specific medical issue that was diagnosed?

No.

Did you try IVF at any point?

Yes, we did.

How many times?

We tried twice, as I mentioned in my testimony.

Did any of the attempts result in pregnancy?

No, they both failed, but we persisted in prayer and kept believing God. Whatever treatment or medication was required, we took it, and we continued trusting God. In His infinite mercy, God answered us.

That is why we are here today, thanking Him for what only He can do. This can only be God. It surpasses human imagination. It is purely God’s intervention.

How did you discover you were pregnant?

I was seeing a doctor at the time. When I began noticing some changes in my body, they ran some tests. It was through those tests that I discovered I was pregnant.

What year was that?

That was in May 2024.

Was it a natural delivery?

No, it was a Caesarean section because of my age.

Was the conception natural, or was there any medical procedure involved?

It was a natural conception. There were no injections or assisted procedures involved.

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I want you to share your experience during the waiting period. How was the waiting period of over 30 years?

The waiting period was very challenging. It was a mixture of pain and occasional joy. Sometimes, when people know you do not have a child, they react to you differently. Some may not fully accept you, even within family or friendship circles.

Not everyone understands what it means to wait. There were painful experiences, and I had to deliberately cast them behind me so they would not affect my focus. At a point, I was dwelling on the situation too much, but later I received the wisdom to ignore the distractions. I had to put them behind me.

When some people later heard that I had put to bed, they said, ‘Ah, so she had been passing through that challenge? We didn’t even know.’ Many people did not know because, after some time, I stopped talking about it.

When people would ask, ‘How are your children?’ I would respond politely, but when I returned to my place of prayer, I would say, ‘God, they are asking You, where are these children? Let these children manifest. Let them not be far away from us again.’ That became my regular confession.

The journey was not easy, but I enjoyed the grace of God throughout. Eventually, His power was made manifest. I cannot point to any particular experience now that still makes me feel bitter.

However, I remember moments when I thought, ‘If I had my own child, this wouldn’t have happened.’ For example, there were times I sent another person’s daughter on an errand, and the mother refused to allow her to go. That was painful.

At one point, some children were visiting us, and their mother later suggested they were not well taken care of. That hurt deeply because I had done my best for them.

However, each painful experience drove me back to God. I would say, ‘Lord, only You can do this.’

There were moments I did not even know how it would happen anymore. I simply held on to God’s promise that I would not fail. That assurance sustained me.

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Some of my friends later reminded me that during our conversations, I always told them that no matter how long it took, I would have my own child. I may not remember saying it, but two of them confirmed it.

In the end, the entire experience has been God-centred. God knew about it all along. His name alone deserves to be praised and glorified.

How did you go through all these and still remain psychologically strong?

Before I talk about how it feels now, let me add this: in such a situation, there are times you honestly do not know what to do. Sometimes, you lose interest in many things — even in going out or associating with people.

I remember one day, I saw a friend at a shopping mall. She didn’t see me, but I saw her — and I carefully dodged her. I avoided her because I didn’t want her to ask, ‘Where are your children?’ and start the conversation all over again. I didn’t want to explain anything. So I made sure she didn’t see me. That was one of the experiences I had.

At times, you become disinterested in outings because people will ask about your children. In our community, especially in the Black community, not having a child can come with stigma. You feel stigmatised. That was part of the experience.

On the other hand, I also had people who supported me throughout the journey — people who believed that since God had promised, it would surely happen.

Now that the baby has come, my interest in doing many things has been awakened. I feel more motivated. There is something pushing you, something more meaningful to live for.

What other painful experience did you endure?

There was another painful experience. Someone once asked me to give him money. I said I didn’t have any. He told me to go and bring my ATM card and then said, ‘What are you even using your money for?’ That day, I really felt hurt. I wondered, ‘Why would this person say that? Is it because I don’t have a child?’

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When I told my husband, he asked how I responded. I said I didn’t reply; I just looked at the person. My husband himself also had experiences — comments that could easily demoralise someone. But we thank God. Only God’s name can be glorified. This can only be God.

Do you think it was just divine intervention or medications that helped you?

Even if you go through treatments, unless God permits them to work, they will not work. That is the truth. So, I give Him all the glory.

How did you handle your in-laws who couldn’t wait any longer for you to have a child?

I tried not to overreact. I understood that they, too, might be anxious.

Sometimes, the pain comes from general comments people make without realising how hurtful they are — not necessarily from in-laws alone. We did not have fights.

They didn’t fight me, and I didn’t fight them.

What would you like to say to other women who have been married for five, 10, or even 15 years without a child?

What I would like to say to anyone trusting God for the fruit of the womb is this: please look unto God. Be steadfast and remain focused.

At the same time, do the needful. If you need medical treatment, seek treatment. If you need to interact with people and maintain healthy relationships, do so. Do not dwell too much on the pain — even though the pain can be overwhelming. Instead, dwell on the Word of God. Focus on His promises.

I also want to say that God greatly used Mountain of Fire and Miracles Ministries to bless me. I have been deeply involved in the prayer life, counselling sessions, and the teaching of the Word at MFM. I joined MFM in 1998, four years after I got married.

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‘I have cancer,’ Nollywood actress Cynthia Anijekwu cries, calls for support

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Nollywood actress Cynthia Anijekwu has made an emotional appeal to Nigerians for financial assistance after revealing that she is battling cancer for the second time.

In a video circulating on social media on Tuesday, the actress disclosed that she was first diagnosed with cancer in 2023, when she underwent surgery followed by chemotherapy in a bid to halt the disease.

She maintained that doctors initially managed the condition after the treatment, but the cancer later returned and has since spread to her bones, requiring more intensive care, including radiation therapy and another surgery.

According to Anijekwu, recent medical examinations revealed that the cancer has spread to her bones, significantly increasing the cost and complexity of her treatment up to N600,000 every month.

The actress said doctors have recommended radiation therapy and another surgery as part of her ongoing care.

“I have cancer in 2023 (sic). I did my surgery and took chemotherapy, but later it came back again. I’ve been in and out of the hospital. The doctor recently told me it has reached my bones, and the treatment is now much more expensive,” she said.

“I need to live. I need to survive. I’m asking Nigerians to please help me. Anyone that can help, please, I need help. Even my hands have swollen. The cancer has affected both breasts. I need to live. Please help me. I need to survive.

“Your one naira, your two naira can add up to something reasonable for me to get the proper treatment for this cancer. I’m begging you, please help me,” she pleaded.

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Before her health challenge became public, Anijekwu built her career in Nollywood, featuring in several English- and Igbo-language productions.

However, there is no publicly verifiable record identifying a major blockbuster film or comprehensive filmography associated with the actress, as public attention has largely shifted to her battle with cancer in recent years.

The actress said the financial burden has become overwhelming for her family, prompting her to seek help from members of the public.

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It’s not easy, surrogate mother shares emotional journey

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A masked Nigerian surrogate mother has opened up about how financial hardship and what she described as an irresponsible partner led her to become a surrogate, saying the decision came after the loss of her second child.

The woman disclosed this during a new episode on Cruise TV published on YouTube on Sunday, where she recounted the emotional, financial and psychological realities of carrying children for other families.

She said becoming a surrogate was one of the hardest decisions she had ever made, describing the emotional attachment that develops during pregnancy despite knowing the child does not belong to her.

“Emotionally it’s not easy. Even when I started the journey, when the pregnancy was three months, I called my nurse that I don’t think I can cope again because it’s not easy to carry what is not yours.

“When you start having the emotional attachment, you keep reminding yourself that this is not mine. I tell myself it is a job, and that helps me cope, but the emotions still come and go.”

The woman explained that she became a gestational surrogate through IVF, meaning she had no biological connection to the babies she carried.

Speaking on what pushed her into surrogacy, she said her partner failed to provide for the family despite her efforts to support them.

“I had my first child. Unfortunately, my husband is not the person that is hardworking and he doesn’t take responsibility. I do work. There is no work I cannot do.

“When I became pregnant the second time, I could no longer work. We couldn’t even afford hospital bills.”

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She said complications during the pregnancy eventually led to the death of the baby, an experience that changed her outlook.

“That baby died, and that was the reason I made that decision. Instead of giving him another baby, I would rather help people who have the money to take care of me.

“If you don’t have the money to care for my health, I won’t do it for you.”

She disclosed that she initially declined financial compensation beyond medical care, accommodation and allowances, a decision she now regrets.

“I told them I didn’t want any compensation aside from the process, monthly allowance, wardrobe allowance and accommodation fee, but that was a mistake.

“I won’t do it again,” she said.

The surrogate mother also said she would not encourage her daughter to follow the same path because of the emotional and health risks involved.

“I cannot advise my daughter to be a surrogate.”

She added that she relocated during one of her pregnancies to avoid stigma and often told people the baby had died whenever they asked questions.

According to her, surrogate mothers also face psychological challenges after delivery despite undergoing counselling before and after childbirth.

While acknowledging that surrogacy has helped many couples struggling with infertility, she maintained that the process is far more demanding than many people realise.

“Surrogacy is not as simple as people think.”

She called for stronger regulation of the practice to protect surrogate mothers from exploitation and ensure adequate emotional and financial support.

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I waited 18 years before welcoming twins – Nollywood star Ricardo Agbor

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Veteran Nollywood actor, Ricardo Agbor, has opened up about his 18-year journey to parenthood, revealing that he and his wife waited nearly two decades before welcoming their twins.

The actor disclosed this during an interview with AfricanAList published on Sunday, where he reflected on his marriage, faith and the challenges he faced before becoming a father.

Agbor said he remained committed to his wife throughout the period, despite the long wait for children.

“I wanted to get married to a particular lady; I married her regardless of where she is from. She is not from my tribe. So ordinarily, we were supposed to have strife; no, it was very fair,” he said.

Speaking about the couple’s struggle with childlessness, the actor said he specifically prayed for twins and refused to give up despite waiting for 18 years.

“It took 18 years for me to have the twins. And I waited. God knows, 18 years and they are 14 now, so I told God I wanted twins.

“So while that wait was on, if it were someone else, he would cross. But at the end of the day, I have twins. I have a boy and a girl. I asked God what I wanted,” he added.

Agbor also recounted what he described as the most painful experience of his life — the death of his mother.

According to him, she had been receiving treatment for about three weeks without any improvement before doctors advised that she should be flown to South Africa for further medical care.

The actor said his mother requested to be moved to another private hospital in Surulere, but she died in his arms while he was helping her into the car.

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“My mom died right in my arms. At the hospital, they were bringing almost 10 doctors to do tests… the sickness was not improving after almost three weeks.

“It was after three weeks that they told me to come and carry my mom and take her to South Africa. I took my mom away and took her to another private hospital within Surulere. It was my mom that told me to take her away from that place. As I was carrying her into the car, she gave up,” he said.

Agbor said the loss left him devastated, noting that it was the first time he had cried outside acting.

“I think that was the first time I cried in my life. I don’t cry. If I cry, maybe it is in a movie and it is a role. So I cried. It was painful,” he added.

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