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How we waited for 31 years before having our first child – Couple

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Laundry Manager at Mountain of Fire and Miracles Ministries, Prayer City, Mrs Kemi Omotinugbon, who welcomed her first child at the age of 56 after 31 years of marriage, shares with GRACE EDEMA how she overcame the trying periods

What do you do and how old are you?

I work at MFM Prayer City as a laundry manager. I am 57 years old. I was born on July 13, 1968.

When did you get married?

I got married in 1994.

When you got married in 1994, like most couples, you probably expected to have a child within a year or two. At what point did you realise there was a challenge with getting pregnant?

We realised it was a challenge about five years into the marriage.

What did you do after discovering that?

We started by praying. After that, we sought medical treatment and saw a doctor for possible solutions.

Was there any specific medical issue that was diagnosed?

No.

Did you try IVF at any point?

Yes, we did.

How many times?

We tried twice, as I mentioned in my testimony.

Did any of the attempts result in pregnancy?

No, they both failed, but we persisted in prayer and kept believing God. Whatever treatment or medication was required, we took it, and we continued trusting God. In His infinite mercy, God answered us.

That is why we are here today, thanking Him for what only He can do. This can only be God. It surpasses human imagination. It is purely God’s intervention.

How did you discover you were pregnant?

I was seeing a doctor at the time. When I began noticing some changes in my body, they ran some tests. It was through those tests that I discovered I was pregnant.

What year was that?

That was in May 2024.

Was it a natural delivery?

No, it was a Caesarean section because of my age.

Was the conception natural, or was there any medical procedure involved?

It was a natural conception. There were no injections or assisted procedures involved.

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I want you to share your experience during the waiting period. How was the waiting period of over 30 years?

The waiting period was very challenging. It was a mixture of pain and occasional joy. Sometimes, when people know you do not have a child, they react to you differently. Some may not fully accept you, even within family or friendship circles.

Not everyone understands what it means to wait. There were painful experiences, and I had to deliberately cast them behind me so they would not affect my focus. At a point, I was dwelling on the situation too much, but later I received the wisdom to ignore the distractions. I had to put them behind me.

When some people later heard that I had put to bed, they said, ‘Ah, so she had been passing through that challenge? We didn’t even know.’ Many people did not know because, after some time, I stopped talking about it.

When people would ask, ‘How are your children?’ I would respond politely, but when I returned to my place of prayer, I would say, ‘God, they are asking You, where are these children? Let these children manifest. Let them not be far away from us again.’ That became my regular confession.

The journey was not easy, but I enjoyed the grace of God throughout. Eventually, His power was made manifest. I cannot point to any particular experience now that still makes me feel bitter.

However, I remember moments when I thought, ‘If I had my own child, this wouldn’t have happened.’ For example, there were times I sent another person’s daughter on an errand, and the mother refused to allow her to go. That was painful.

At one point, some children were visiting us, and their mother later suggested they were not well taken care of. That hurt deeply because I had done my best for them.

However, each painful experience drove me back to God. I would say, ‘Lord, only You can do this.’

There were moments I did not even know how it would happen anymore. I simply held on to God’s promise that I would not fail. That assurance sustained me.

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Some of my friends later reminded me that during our conversations, I always told them that no matter how long it took, I would have my own child. I may not remember saying it, but two of them confirmed it.

In the end, the entire experience has been God-centred. God knew about it all along. His name alone deserves to be praised and glorified.

How did you go through all these and still remain psychologically strong?

Before I talk about how it feels now, let me add this: in such a situation, there are times you honestly do not know what to do. Sometimes, you lose interest in many things — even in going out or associating with people.

I remember one day, I saw a friend at a shopping mall. She didn’t see me, but I saw her — and I carefully dodged her. I avoided her because I didn’t want her to ask, ‘Where are your children?’ and start the conversation all over again. I didn’t want to explain anything. So I made sure she didn’t see me. That was one of the experiences I had.

At times, you become disinterested in outings because people will ask about your children. In our community, especially in the Black community, not having a child can come with stigma. You feel stigmatised. That was part of the experience.

On the other hand, I also had people who supported me throughout the journey — people who believed that since God had promised, it would surely happen.

Now that the baby has come, my interest in doing many things has been awakened. I feel more motivated. There is something pushing you, something more meaningful to live for.

What other painful experience did you endure?

There was another painful experience. Someone once asked me to give him money. I said I didn’t have any. He told me to go and bring my ATM card and then said, ‘What are you even using your money for?’ That day, I really felt hurt. I wondered, ‘Why would this person say that? Is it because I don’t have a child?’

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When I told my husband, he asked how I responded. I said I didn’t reply; I just looked at the person. My husband himself also had experiences — comments that could easily demoralise someone. But we thank God. Only God’s name can be glorified. This can only be God.

Do you think it was just divine intervention or medications that helped you?

Even if you go through treatments, unless God permits them to work, they will not work. That is the truth. So, I give Him all the glory.

How did you handle your in-laws who couldn’t wait any longer for you to have a child?

I tried not to overreact. I understood that they, too, might be anxious.

Sometimes, the pain comes from general comments people make without realising how hurtful they are — not necessarily from in-laws alone. We did not have fights.

They didn’t fight me, and I didn’t fight them.

What would you like to say to other women who have been married for five, 10, or even 15 years without a child?

What I would like to say to anyone trusting God for the fruit of the womb is this: please look unto God. Be steadfast and remain focused.

At the same time, do the needful. If you need medical treatment, seek treatment. If you need to interact with people and maintain healthy relationships, do so. Do not dwell too much on the pain — even though the pain can be overwhelming. Instead, dwell on the Word of God. Focus on His promises.

I also want to say that God greatly used Mountain of Fire and Miracles Ministries to bless me. I have been deeply involved in the prayer life, counselling sessions, and the teaching of the Word at MFM. I joined MFM in 1998, four years after I got married.

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Why Do Some People Hate Being Corrected?

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Some people can accept praise without a problem—but the moment you point out their mistake, everything changes.

You bring facts, they bring anger.

You try to explain, they become defensive.

You calmly point out that they may be wrong, and suddenly you become the problem.

But why?

For some people, being corrected feels like an attack on their intelligence, authority, or pride. Instead of seeing correction as an opportunity to learn, they see it as an attempt to embarrass them.

And let’s be honest: nobody knows everything.

Even intelligent and experienced people make mistakes. The ability to listen, reconsider your position, and admit when you are wrong is not weakness—it is a sign of maturity.

At the same time, correction should be done with respect. There is a big difference between helping someone understand their mistake and deliberately embarrassing them in front of others.

The real question is:

Do people hate being corrected because of pride, or because they genuinely believe they are right?

And another question:

How do you react when someone points out that you are wrong?

👇 Share your opinion in the comments. Let’s have an honest conversation.

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Parental Trauma vs. Outside Trauma: Which Hurts Children More?

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A child can survive many difficult experiences—but what happens when the person causing the pain is the same person they expect to protect them?

This is a question many families may not want to discuss.

Trauma from outsiders can come from bullying, relatives, teachers, friends, or other people. It can damage a child’s confidence and leave emotional scars for years.

But parental trauma can feel different.

When a child repeatedly experiences humiliation, rejection, harsh insults, neglect, constant comparison, fear, or emotional abuse from a parent, the child may begin to question their own worth.

The painful irony is that the child may still desperately want the love and approval of the person hurting them.

But here is where the debate gets complicated:

Is parental trauma always worse than trauma from outsiders?

Or can an experience involving an outsider be just as devastating—or even worse—depending on what happened and how long it lasted?

🔥 THE NEWSBREAK365 QUESTION:

Which one do you think hurts children more?

🔴 PARENTAL TRAUMA
🔵 TRAUMA CAUSED BY OUTSIDERS

Don’t just choose one.

Tell us what you think and explain your reasons. 👇

Someone reading your comment may see their own childhood experience differently.

What do you think?

#NewsBreak365 #ChildhoodTrauma #Parenting #ParentingDebate #FamilyMatters #ChildProtection #MentalHealth #AfricanParents #NigerianParents #LetsTalk

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Tunde Kelani reveals why he is still passionate about filmmaking

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Veteran filmmaker and cinematographer, Tunde Kelani, discusses with VERA ALKALI about his career and current trends in the industry

You have had an extraordinary journey in the film industry. Can you take us through the highest and lowest moments of your career?

You cannot just say the highest moments because that is a jump. I joined the industry at an early age. I had uncles who were already in the industry, but I also grew up in a community in Abeokuta (Ogun State) where I was exposed to different forms of culture and oral traditions.

As soon as I could read and write in Yoruba, I took off from there. Abeokuta is a meeting point of culture, and my experience started from there. I could read to my grandfather, and we learnt English alongside Yoruba. I was able to compare what I learnt from social studies with what I learnt through Yoruba culture.

That was how I started. Later, I went into photography and eventually moved into motion pictures. I was employed by Western United Television, where I was trained primarily as a film cameraman.

I later attended the London Film School for the artistic and technical aspects of filmmaking. When I returned, I worked in television for one or two years before becoming an independent filmmaker.

From that point, I began to see films by people such as Professor Wole Soyinka, Bandesola Oru, Rasheed Onikoyi and Hubert Ogunde. I had known some of these people and had seen their works on the big screen.

Before then, I was already a film enthusiast. I practically saw all the films that came into Lagos and were shown in some of the theatres at the time.

On the high side, I think I chose the medium of cinema particularly to promote, preserve and document the rich Yoruba culture.

I have benefited from global cinema, including Hollywood, Japanese, Indian, Italian and European cinema, but people often ask me, “What is your style?” I tell them my style is unique. Having benefited from global cinema, I am still impressed by the Yoruba acting tradition.

I have seen people such as Kola Ogunmola and Oyin Adejobi. Those were my coaches. I also had many mentors, and that became my take-off point.

You mentioned being influenced by Hollywood, Japanese, Italian and other cinemas. What cultural differences or shocks did you experience in filmmaking and cinematography?

I think global cinema is about identity. You just know it. When you see an Indian film, you know it is Indian. When you see a Japanese film, you know it is Japanese. When you see a South Korean film, you know it is South Korean.

When you see me as a Yoruba man with my abetiaja cap on, you know that is our signature.

You have worked as a cinematographer, director and producer. Which aspect of filmmaking would you say is your favourite?

I trained for two years at the London Film School. The course specialised in the Diploma of Art and Technical Filmmaking.

Primarily, I am a storyteller. I share my experiences, our culture and our history, but I use cinema as my vehicle for dissemination.

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You are a Yoruba man and have made films that strongly reflect Yoruba culture. What does it mean to you to convey your messages in Yoruba and preserve the culture through film?

That is my whole being. It is my essence. It is my culture and language.

I am an advocate for indigenous cultural expression, and I believe Nigeria should be united in diversity.

Our films are not displaying enough of that diversity. We have more than 300 languages, but we hardly see movies depicting these different cultures and languages in Nigeria.

As someone who is committed to indigenous storytelling, how do you decide which stories are worth telling?

My works are classified. Most of them are adaptations from literature. ‘Oleku’ and some of my works were written by authors such as Femi Osofisan and others.

Most of the films I make are adapted from texts. So, I work more from text to screen because of my background. I have read works by many of these authors.

Some are classified as ‘conscience drama’ because they are films that explore socio-political themes. ‘Saworoide’, ‘Arugba’ and ‘Campus Queen’ are examples of socio-political films.

What attracted you to bringing literature to the screen?

I was born in Lagos, but my father decided that I should be brought up in Abeokuta. I was taken to the family compound. I missed my mother, but I had a lot of people around me catering for me.

However, I felt lonely. As soon as I could read and write, I found reading to be a comfort, and a form of escape At that point, literature got stuck with me, and I learnt how to use it.

It is difficult for filmmakers to pick a favourite among their works, but if you had to choose one, which would it be?

All my works give me satisfaction and recognition. They also came with equal amounts of ups and downs because making a successful film is very challenging.

But my latest film, ‘Cordelia’, is my favourite.

Can you take us through the making of Cordelia?

‘Cordelia’ is adapted from Femi Osofisan’s novel of the same title, and I had kept the project for years.

In fact, I was going to make it before ‘Maami’ (which was released in 2012). When I got to Femi Osofisan and we discussed it, he wondered why I was interested in it. He went in and brought ‘Maami, but I insisted that I wanted ‘Cordelia’ at the time.

About three or four years ago, I received visitors from the University of Delaware in the United States. The music department wanted a sort of cultural fusion. They said that if we made the soundtrack for the film, they would orchestrate it in the United States.

I was interested. They were asking for an old film from me, but I said, ‘No, we would do a new film.’

I told them about ‘Cordelia’ and explained that it was the new film we wanted to make because the story could inspire a solid musical score. It is so dramatic that it can inspire a strong musical composition.

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When you compare filmmaking today with what obtained in your early days, which era do you feel more connected to?

It does not matter because I have worked with all the new technologies of making motion pictures.

Recently, I completed an experiment in a small studio which I call “Studio Lab”, where I combined all the known technologies of making motion pictures, including physical sets, green screen, traditional props and everything else.

I have also added digital cinema cameras and artificial intelligence. So, it combines all of them.

What is your view on artificial intelligence and its growing role in filmmaking?

Artificial intelligence is everything, but just like when computers came and they added sound cards and graphics cards, I knew it was going to come into motion picture production.

I started early. It is the same thing with any technology that comes along. I embrace it.

We should embrace technology, but it should not replace our culture or our language. We should be in control and not let it tell our stories for us.

How do you blend artificial intelligence with Yoruba culture and other indigenous cultures?

Artificial intelligence technology is already a tool. Most of the time, if we are making a movie, our script is written in English. Later, we indicate the dialogue in Yoruba.

Filmmaking is a collaborative medium. You can have 150 people working on a film, and most of them may not be Yoruba.

You document, organise the group and use everything that technology provides. The technology is the tool, but the product becomes whatever you want it to be.

There has been an emergence of more Nigerian movies in cinemas. Do you think contemporary directors and producers are doing enough to preserve Nigerian cultures?

We have gatekeepers; I mean those people who fund movies. They are not necessarily interested in cultural preservation. They want to invest in a business, recoup their money and make a profit.

So, it is business. You can make a movie that they do not think will sell well, and that becomes a challenge.

The world is rapidly changing, and people’s tastes are changing as well.

I consider myself a “techie”. Even with all my experience with technology, I am still surprised by how many things you can do with a smartphone. Today, I lectured with my smartphone.

That is what technology is all about. We have witnessed similar things with the advent of video games and mobile phones, and now we are talking about artificial intelligence. These are all tools.

You recently received an award from the Nigerian Academy of Letters. Did you expect this kind of recognition when you were starting out?

I never really set out with recognition in mind. I was simply passionate about what I was doing. From photography to cinematography, advertising, music and everything else I got involved in, I was driven by the desire to create and communicate.

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I had stories I wanted to share with people, and that was what occupied my mind. I wanted to use whatever medium was available to me to tell those stories and connect with people. I was more concerned about the work itself and how best I could express what I had in mind than about whether anybody would recognise or reward me for it.

So, awards were never the motivation. They are certainly appreciated, and I am grateful whenever my work is recognised, but when I was starting out, I was not thinking about receiving awards many years later. I was simply following my passion, learning along the way and trying to tell stories that I believed were worth telling.

If you are passionate about what you do and remain committed to it, recognition may come, but it should not be the reason you do the work.

Many young filmmakers and creatives look up to you. What is your advice to them?

Number one, it is about passion.

You have to be passionate about what you are doing. If you are not passionate about it, it becomes very difficult to sustain yourself, especially in a creative field where you will face many challenges, disappointments and moments when things may not go the way you want.

In fact, my case is different. I am not supposed to be known because I am the person behind the camera. I am not a star. My job has always been to help tell the story and make sure that the story gets across to the audience in the best possible way. I have always been comfortable being behind the camera and allowing the work to speak for me.

For young filmmakers, I would say they should not be in a hurry to become famous. They should concentrate on learning their craft, understanding the medium and developing their own voice. You must be willing to learn continuously because filmmaking is changing all the time. The technology changes, the platforms change and the way people consume stories changes, but the fundamental need to tell good stories remains.

They should also understand that there are many different roles in filmmaking. You do not necessarily have to be the person in front of the camera. You can be a cinematographer, editor, writer, sound designer, production designer, director or work in any of the other areas that make filmmaking possible. What matters is that you find the area where your passion lies and develop yourself in it.

For me, the most important thing is to remain committed to the work. Fame and recognition may come, but they should be secondary. If you have passion, discipline and a story to tell, keep working at it. Eventually, the quality of your work will speak for you.

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