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Untold story of workers who keep Lagos running while others sleep

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As night descends on Lagos, the city slips into a different rhythm but never truly sleeps. Across its streets and workplaces, night workers endure long, gruelling hours, juggling family responsibilities, financial pressures and daily risks. For women, these demands are often compounded by distinct safety concerns and societal expectations. IBRAHIM ADAM writes that, beyond placing significant strain on social and family life, night work could have dire health implications, including mental health disorders

As the night settles and the world begins to slow, many embark on a journey that defies the familiar nine-to-five routine, stepping into roles that keep society functioning long after daylight fades.

One of such is Abubakar Mohammed. On this very night, he stands quietly in the dim glow of a warehouse tucked within the bustling Ladipo Market in Mushin, Lagos State, keeping watch as the city settles into the uneasy calm of night.

For 16 years, the life of this 38-year-old has been defined by responsibility and perseverance, spent navigating long, quiet hours as a night guard.

A father of six – five girls and one boy, the weight of his family’s future rests squarely on his shoulders, upheld by an unwavering work ethic and a profound sense of duty.

Speaking to Saturday PUNCH, Mohammed said fatherhood, to him, is far more than a biological role; it is a profound moral and practical obligation that guides every decision he makes.

He hails from Gao, a historic city in Mali and the capital of the Gao Region. Situated along the River Niger, about 320 kilometres east-south-east of Timbuktu, the city lies on the river’s left bank at the junction with the Tilemsi Valley. It is from this distant landscape that his journey to Lagos began, culminating in a life defined by sacrifice in a foreign land.

“Fatherhood is the foundation of my life and the guiding force behind every decision I make,” he said. “To me, being a father goes beyond biological responsibility. It represents leadership, discipline, sacrifice and long-term planning. Every day, I am aware that my actions and work ethic directly influence the future of my children, and this awareness shapes the way I live and work.”

On why he chose to take up night guard duty, Mohammed said the decision was both a necessity and a deliberate choice. The financial stability required to meet his children’s educational, medical and daily needs, he explained, could not be achieved through daytime trading alone.

“I did not take on this work by chance,” he said. “The decision came after careful reflection on my responsibilities as a provider. With six children at different stages of growth, their education and financial stability became more important than personal comfort. Daytime work alone was not enough to meet our essential needs, so I chose this job as a sacrifice, knowing that a consistent income is critical to family security.”

Beyond economic pressure, he added, the decision to work at night was driven by a personal resolve to confront his responsibilities head-on.

Mohammed explained that night work demands constant alertness, mental resilience and strict routines, both to protect himself and safeguard the goods under his care.

“My work requires discipline, vigilance and mental strength,” he said. “Each night begins with preparation and a clear understanding of my duties. The environment may appear calm, but it can change without warning, so I must remain alert and composed at all times. Fatigue is unavoidable, but professionalism demands consistency.”

He acknowledged that irregular sleep and physical exhaustion remain major challenges, noting that daytime rest rarely offers the same restoration as sleep at night.

“I have had to develop a routine that allows me to rest whenever possible and manage my strength carefully,” he added. “Protecting my health is essential to fulfilling my responsibilities.”

Experts have linked prolonged night work to a range of health challenges, from chronic illnesses and emotional exhaustion to mental health disorders and fractured relationships. They noted that the impact of night shift on health is not just a personal issue, but a public health concern.

The cost to family life

While night work provides financial stability, Mohammed admitted it comes at a high emotional cost. His absence, he said, limits meaningful engagement with his children and strains family life.

“The demands of this work affect my family life,” he explained. “Spending long hours away from home reduces the time I have with my children, and missing important moments is emotionally difficult. Still, I make deliberate efforts to remain involved in their lives, even if I can only go home once a week on Sundays, or sometimes once every two weeks.”

Earning a monthly salary of N50,000, Mohammed remains firm in his belief that honest labour carries dignity.

“The contributions of night workers are often overlooked,” he said. “Many people enjoy safety, order and comfort without thinking about those who work behind the scenes. Although recognition is limited, I am grateful for my N50,000 salary, which I believe is the highest for anyone doing this work in this market. That is why I tell my colleagues that honest labour, carried out with integrity, has value, even when it goes unseen.”

For Mohammed, success is not measured by comfort or wealth, but by the stability, guidance and security he provides for his children.

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“What keeps me motivated is my sense of duty as a father and provider,” he added. “At this stage of my life, success means laying a strong foundation for my children. If my efforts today allow them to grow up with access to education, discipline and opportunity, then every sacrifice is worthwhile. That belief gives me hope and strength.”

Household in transition

Mohammed’s wife, Aisha, spoke to Saturday PUNCH about the adjustments and emotional resilience required to navigate her husband’s frequent absence from home. She recognises the necessity of his sacrifice while shouldering the void it creates.

“When my husband began working at night, I felt both worried and proud,” she said. “I understood the need to provide for our children, but I feared the long hours and physical strain might affect his health. At first, adjusting to his absence was difficult, especially because our home felt emptier without the energy and presence he brings.”

Aisha emphasised that maintaining communication is crucial for emotional connection and mutual understanding, helping the family remain aligned even when Mohammed is physically away.

“To stay connected, we rely on phone calls and voice messages, which help us maintain a sense of closeness,” she explained. “I also make sure our children understand why their father works these hours, so we remain united through understanding and purpose.”

Dauda’s 15-year vigil

In the same Ladipo, 42-year-old Abdullahi Dauda walks a path few notice, carrying the weight of responsibility with so much discipline.

He hails from Sakadamna, a rural community in Dosso, the capital of the Dosso Region in south-western Niger, near the borders with Nigeria and the Benin Republic.

Married to Sekina and father to a boy and a girl, Dauda has been a security guard for 27 years, dedicating the last 15 years to night duty, a role that demands extreme vigilance.

Dauda’s entry into night work was guided more by circumstance than personal preference. Limited daytime opportunities and mounting responsibilities led him to take on the work as a means to support his family despite its inherent challenges.

“I began this work 15 years ago out of a strong sense of responsibility to provide for my family,” he said. “Life demands consistency, and I quickly realised that relying solely on limited daytime opportunities would not be enough. I accepted night work as part of my commitment to survival, responsibility and progress.

3D illustration of medical workers and a security guard

“No one naturally prefers to stay awake while others rest, but I deliberately chose this schedule because it provided stability in an uncertain environment. Economic pressure also played a major role; the rising cost of living made it risky to rely on a single source of income. Choosing night work was my way of taking control of my situation rather than waiting for circumstances to improve, because nobody will help you if you wait.”

The night routine

Night after night, Dauda remains alert, making split-second decisions and enduring conditions many would avoid.

“A typical night begins shortly after evening, when I report for duty,” he explained. “Upon arrival, I carefully inspect my assigned area to ensure everything is in order. Throughout the night, I remain vigilant, knowing that even a moment of distraction can lead to serious consequences.

“There are periods of quiet, but even then, focus is essential. Brief conversations with colleagues help us stay awake and maintain morale, yet resting is not an option. As dawn approaches, I complete my responsibilities and either rest briefly or move on to other tasks, depending on the day’s demands.”

Dauda stressed that the sacrifices of night work are largely invisible to the public, where assumptions about rest and inactivity prevail.

“The most intense moments come with unexpected movement or unfamiliar sounds. Quick judgment, teamwork and awareness are critical to maintaining safety. Many people assume night work involves resting, but it demands constant mental and physical endurance. Exposure to cold, rain, isolation and fatigue is part of the job. The emotional strength required to remain committed despite exhaustion is rarely acknowledged.”

He added that night work disrupts natural sleep cycles and energy levels, making rest whenever possible essential.

“Rest comes in short, irregular intervals during the day. Over time, this affects my energy and overall well-being. I have learned to value sleep whenever the opportunity arises, even if only for a short while, because protecting my health is essential to continuing this work,” he said.

Impact on family

Dauda emphasised that night work profoundly affects family life, limiting quality interaction and causing missed moments.

“This work restricts the time I can spend with my family and loved ones. Important moments are often missed, and maintaining close relationships requires extra effort and understanding. That is why I travel to see them, often only once every one and a half to two years. Communication has become essential, helping me remain emotionally present even when physically absent. Balancing work with personal life remains one of my greatest challenges,” he said.

Despite modest pay and limited recognition, Dauda continues to persevere.

“Night workers are often underappreciated. The effort and vigilance required are rarely matched by adequate compensation. I started with N5,000 and now earn N25,000. Even so, I will continue to give my best.”

Family adjustments

During a phone conversation with Saturday PUNCH, Dauda’s wife, Sekina, said the work caused her anxiety, but that the family have no choice but to adapt.

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“When Dauda started night work, I was anxious because I feared he would be overworked and exposed to danger,” she said. “I understood it was necessary to earn money, so I tried to accept it while remaining supportive. I had to adjust my routines to accommodate his absence and take on more household responsibilities because when he is around, he helps a lot at home.”

Sekina highlighted how the night schedule has reshaped family life and how they maintain emotional closeness despite the distance.

“We now stay connected via phone. He checks in whenever he can, and I encourage the children to speak with him over phone or video calls. Hearing his voice, even for a few minutes, reassures us and keeps our emotional bond strong,” she said.

Muazu’s 23-year sleepless nights

Muazu, 47, moves through a section of a bustling warehouse at Ladipo Market, quietly observing as traders leave for the day.

A seasoned security guard, his 23 years of experience have taught him that vigilance is both a heavy and powerful responsibility.

Also from Gao, Mali, Muazu has spent decades navigating the challenges of his profession while meeting his family’s needs. Married to Madina and father to two daughters and a son, he said:

“My decision to work the night shift was primarily driven by the need to earn enough to support my family. Providing for them is a responsibility I take very seriously. Night work has become one way I meet that obligation,” Muazu told Saturday PUNCH.

By day, he engages in petty trading, selling sweets, biscuits and sachet water, but the income is often insufficient to meet household demands.

“From the very beginning, my motivation has been to earn money and support my family. That reason has never changed and continues to drive my commitment,” he added.

Daily routine and comradeship

At 6:30 p.m., after finishing his daytime trading, Muazu resumes at his duty post, following a routine that blends vigilance with camaraderie among colleagues. His team often pools resources to cook meals rather than buying expensive, unsatisfying food. Between meals, they share jokes and stories to lift each other’s spirits.

“Throughout the night, we remain awake, alert and vigilant, even during heavy rain. By 6:00 a.m., we gather to pray together before resting for two or three hours, then begin another day shift,” Muazu said.

The most intense moments come when potential intrusions occur, requiring swift communication with colleagues to maintain security.

“The busiest moments happen when I hear footsteps approaching the warehouse gate. I quickly alert my colleagues so everyone stays on high alert. There have been attempts by individuals to gain unauthorised access, possibly to steal. Our responsibility is to ensure no such attempt succeeds,” he explained.

Challenges beyond the visible

Muazu emphasised that night work extends far beyond visible risks, involving long hours of exposure to cold, rain and physical discomfort while remaining alert.

“Many people assume night workers simply sleep through the night, but that is far from the truth. Even when drenched or shivering, we remain at our posts to ensure safety,” he said.

Irregular sleep has taken a toll on his health, prompting medical advice to prioritise rest.

“My sleep pattern is irregular, and I rest whenever I can, sometimes only for short periods. At one point, I suffered constant headaches and had to visit Mushin Primary Health Centre. The doctor explained that lack of sleep was the main cause. Since then, I make it a priority to rest whenever possible, even if only for 30 minutes,” he said.

Family and recognition

Muazu noted that night work also comes at the expense to his family bonding.

“I do not spend enough time with my family, which is a major challenge. It can take three and a half to four years before I see some family members. Thankfully, technology allows communication through phone and video calls, helping maintain our relationships,” he said.

Muazu also pointed out that financial compensation does not always reflect the effort and risks involved.

“I primarily do this job for the money, which is why I always give my best. I started earning N5,000, and today I earn N15,000. While the increase is appreciated, it does not fully reflect the risks and demands of the job,” he noted.

Muaze, therefore, appealed for public recognition of night workers.

“Night workers are human beings too. We work tirelessly to protect lives and property while others rest. A little appreciation and understanding would go a long way in acknowledging the sacrifices we make.”

Madina’s life without her husband

His wife, Madina, told Saturday PUNCH that her husband’s absence at night has reshaped their family life.

“When Muazu began working nights, it was a difficult adjustment for me. Initially, I felt a mixture of worry and pride. I worried about his health and safety and how his absence would impact our children, but I also respected his dedication to providing for us,” she said.

The housewife added that communication has become a crucial lifeline, allowing her husband to remain involved in decision-making and daily routines despite the distance.

“Even when he is physically absent, we exchange messages, call each other, and involve him in important family decisions remotely. These interactions, although brief, help him remain a part of daily life despite the distance,” she said.

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‘We want to sleep too, but someone has to stay awake’

While many households drift into sleep each night, 35-year-old Adegboye Olajumoke, a mother of one from Ekiti State, begins a demanding stretch of work that keeps the wards of a private hospital in Mushin running until dawn.

She explained that her decision to work nights was never driven by financial pressure but by the demands of a role that requires uninterrupted care.

“I am a night worker. I work with a private organisation that operates 24 hours a day, so night shifts are sometimes required. It’s part of my duty. It’s not about money; it’s about responsibility. Someone has to be on duty at night,” she said.

Describing her schedule

Olajumoke usually resumes duty between 8:00 p.m. and 8:30 p.m., taking over care responsibilities and reviewing the patients assigned to her for the night. She attends to each patient according to their medical schedules, particularly for routine medications, until morning.

“There isn’t a specific quiet or busy time. Some nights, you’re awake for the entire shift, while other nights, you may complete your duties and have a little time to rest,” she explained.

Olajumoke noted that the workload varies depending on the number of patients and their conditions, often caring for more than five people during a single shift.

Misconceptions and family support

One major challenge, she said, is the widespread assumption that night workers sleep while on duty.

“People often assume you slept during your shift. In reality, you may not get a chance to close your eyes at all until daybreak,” Olajumoke said.

Despite the physical demands, she said night duty has not negatively affected her health, as structured off days allow full recovery.

Rest after every shift is non-negotiable for her well-being, and family support has made balancing work and motherhood possible.

“I have an understanding husband. He knows the demands of my job and steps in when I’m away, which helps a lot,” she said.

Emotionally, Olajumoke described night work as largely task-driven, though she acknowledged moments of empathy when patients experience distress or complications.

“During night shifts, I don’t really feel many emotions, but I focus on the work. However, when something goes wrong with a patient, I do feel empathy and imagine the pain they’re going through,” she said.

Night workers remain undervalued

Olajumoke expressed concern that night workers remain largely unappreciated in Nigeria, despite their critical role in sustaining healthcare services while others sleep.

“Honestly, I will say no, our work is not valued here in Nigeria. You just do the work, but it’s not appreciated,” she said.

She urged the public to recognise the sacrifices behind night duty, emphasising that continuous care depends on those willing to stay awake through the night.

“We also want to sleep at home like you do, but someone has to care for those in the hospital. If everyone goes to bed, who would take care of them? When people see us, I want them to value and respect the work we do,” Olajumoke said.

Night work poses significant health risks

A Public Health Expert, Prof Tanimola Akande, has warned that night work carries serious health risks.

“There are health risks associated with night work. Workers on night shifts are more vulnerable to a range of health issues, particularly when exposed over a prolonged period,” he told Saturday PUNCH.

He explained that night work disrupts the body’s natural biological clock.

“There is a natural circadian rhythm, this is the body’s internal clock that regulates sleep, alertness, and digestion, and is primed by light and darkness. Night shifts distort this rhythm,” he said.

Akande added that prolonged night work can lead to serious health challenges, with some workers resorting to substances to stay awake.

“Long-term night work is associated with sleep disorders, fatigue, obesity, cardiovascular diseases such as hypertension, and mental health issues, including anxiety and depression. Workers may also use stimulants to stay awake, face occupational injuries, contract malaria, experience burnout, and be involved in road traffic accidents due to reduced alertness. Social consequences include family crises, disruptions in family life, and, in some cases, infertility,” he warned.

The medical practitioner emphasised that protective measures can reduce these risks, noting that employers play a key role.

“Reducing the number of night shifts, ensuring adequate rest between shifts, and conducting regular health screenings can help mitigate these problems. Employers need clear policies to manage prolonged and rotational night shifts. Employees should be educated on the risks, and regular medical check-ups should be mandatory for those frequently or permanently on night duty,” he said.

Akande also highlighted that night work remains a largely invisible public health concern.

Employees rarely report health problems related to night work, and employers seldom monitor these challenges, particularly in developing countries. As a result, evidence-based policies to protect night workers are rarely developed or implemented,” he said.

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Lifestyle

Catholic bishops’ inconvenient truth

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Politics and religion often conflate into a toxic brew. So, it is with the storm over John Onaiyekan’s comments after the recent meeting between President Bola Tinubu and the Catholic Bishops’ Conference of Nigeria. As the waves billow and swell, the encounter opens a window into the tremors in government rather than the cardinal’s intentions.

Instead of treating the bishops’ observations as sincere moral feedback from a respected institution, some of the administration’s vocal defenders responded with personal attacks, accusing the cardinal of partisanship and abuse of clerical privilege.

That reaction was unfortunate and avoidable.

No elected government claiming democratic credentials should treat independent criticism as hostility.

Yet the ferocious responses from the Minister of the FCT, Nyesom Wike; the President’s Special Adviser on Policy Communication, Daniel Bwala; and the SSA on Media, Temitope Ajayi, suggested Onaiyekan had committed a grave offence by saying the bishops told the President Nigeria was “bleeding,” that poverty was worsening, and many were struggling under economic reforms.

The cardinal’s fault was not fabricating facts but speaking publicly about an uncomfortable conversation.

He said the President disagreed, insisting the economy was improving and reforms were laying the foundation for recovery.

The bishops, he said, neither expected agreement nor sought to embarrass the President; they were discharging a moral duty to tell him what many Nigerians could not.

That should have ended the matter. Instead, critics turned a healthy exchange into a public quarrel. Bwala questioned the cardinal’s neutrality, alleging the church supported Peter Obi in 2023.

Ajayi dismissed the bishops as offering only one perspective. Wike argued that having taken sides in a past election disqualified the cardinal from impartiality and faulted the bishops for questioning INEC’s neutrality ahead of 2027 without stronger proof.

These points merit consideration. Religious leaders, like journalists and civil society actors, should aim for fairness as credibility rests on intellectual honesty. Achievements by government should be acknowledged. But fairness works both ways.

The administration’s defenders owe Nigerians an honest engagement with the bishops’ substance rather than attempts to discredit the messengers.

Who the cardinal voted for is irrelevant to whether millions of Nigerians are suffering. Hunger and inflation do not check party membership before striking families.

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One of the weakest responses to public criticism is to attack motives while avoiding the issues raised. That strategy failed to convince many Nigerians. Therefore, it is no surprise that support for Onaiyekan flowed from across civic space.

The Northern Youth Council said he reflected lived realities; the Middle Belt Forum called the attacks unfair; the Catholic Laity Council defended the church’s pastoral duty to speak for the vulnerable.

Former governor and minister Rotimi Amaechi, himself a Catholic, reminded the Presidency that bishops have every right to criticise governments and urged responses based on evidence, not indignation.

Even Orji Kalu, APC senator and former Abia State governor, threatened to resign from the party if the bishops were insulted, noting their similar interventions across Africa.

The public backlash appears to have prompted moderation. Secretary to the Government of the Federation, George Akume, reaffirmed the administration’s respect for the Catholic Church and promised deeper consultations.

That is the mature response expected of a confident government, and it should have been the first instinct.

The episode exposes a deeper problem.

With the 2027 elections on the horizon, there is a growing tendency in official circles to interpret every criticism through a partisan lens.

Independent institutions that refuse to sing from the government’s hymn book risk being branded hostile. Such defensiveness serves neither democracy nor good governance.

Onaiyekan’s sharper point was that too many people around the President paint an overly rosy picture of the country. Whether entirely fair, the observation highlights a real danger that administrations insulated by courtiers and loyalists risk mistaking praise for patriotism.

Presidents need more than briefings, official statistics and flattering presentations. They need uncomfortable truths from independent voices including economists, labour unions, journalists, business leaders, traditional rulers and religious organisations.

Governments that refuse to listen lose touch with the people they govern. That is why criticism is not the enemy of reform; silence is.

The Tinubu administration can rightly argue it inherited an economy in deep distress and that difficult choices were necessary. Removing the petrol subsidy and liberalising the foreign exchange market were politically costly but, many economists agree, economically inevitable.

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The government has expanded fiscal space for states, created NELFUND, launched youth initiatives, and helped end the destructive cycle of prolonged ASUU strikes. These are notable achievements and deserve acknowledgement.

But governments are judged by citizens’ lived realities, not only by economic theory or improving macro indicators.

Foreign reserves have strengthened to $52 billion from about $3 billion, fiscal revenues rose to all-time highs, and the naira exchange rate has stabilised compared with the immediate post-reform shock.

Yet these gains have not delivered meaningful relief for the average Nigerian. Inflation remains punishing at over 15 per cent and above 37 per cent in at least 10 states; food and transport costs are soaring; healthcare and medication are costly; electricity tariffs and rent have escalated; small businesses struggle with high energy costs and expensive credit.

For too many families, over 70 per cent of income is spent on feeding alone. Multidimensional poverty affects 63 per cent of Nigerians, per the World Bank.

The bishops sought to communicate that reality. It cannot be dismissed by citing encouraging macro trends.

The reforms are also incomplete. A parallel foreign-exchange market persists, reflecting distortions and weak confidence.

Oil production remains below projections. Domestic refiners complain of inadequate crude supply even as the government extends Project Gazelle with a new $4.5 billion refinancing, raising concerns about future crude commitments while local refining capacity is planned to double.

External debt keeps rising, increasing exchange-rate exposure and debt-service obligations, which already consume half of revenues.

Terrorism, banditry and kidnapping continue to terrorise large swathes of the country, driving farmers from fertile lands and worsening food inflation.

Official and independent reports indicate that more than 628,000 people have been killed and over 2.2 million abducted since 2023, according to a BusinessDay report in June.

These are measurable national realities, not opposition talking points. Governments need independent voices to speak honestly about them.  No pushback can erase the fact that Nigeria is bleeding.

The Catholic Church has a long history of such moral witness. During military rule, bishops such as Olubunmi Okogie, an Emeritus Cardinal, condemned authoritarianism, corruption and human-rights abuses.

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Under democratic governments, the church continued to criticise administrations across the political spectrum over insecurity, governance failures and human suffering. Its loyalty has been to moral principles, not to any party.

Tinubu should not regard himself as uniquely persecuted, nor should his supporters mistake clerical witness for partisan politics.

Religious leaders are, firstly, citizens. They bury terrorism victims, counsel unemployed graduates, comfort widows and feed hungry families. If such leaders cannot speak about poverty, insecurity and governance, democracy becomes a farce.

Political parties are also inconsistent. Many who now defend petrol subsidy removal opposed it when it was proposed under President Goodluck Jonathan. Those who benefited from the freedom to criticise must not deny others the same liberty when roles reverse.

One of the most perilous governance tendencies is believing that criticism weakens government. On the contrary, governments make worse mistakes when they become prisoners of official optimism.

They need independent feedback to test whether policies yield intended outcomes. Economic models and official reports are necessary but insufficient; they must be complemented by honest input from labour, business, academia, the media, civil society and faith leaders. Without it, governments risk governing statistical abstractions rather than human realities.

It is encouraging that the administration now appears to be recalibrating. Akume’s pledge of deeper engagement deserves commendation.

Consultation, not confrontation, marks mature democratic leadership. The Presidency gains nothing by quarrelling with institutions focused on the country’s welfare.

Tinubu has often said he welcomes constructive criticism. He insisted that he sought the job and should not be pitied. This episode is a chance to prove it.

Labelling respected clerics as partisan for voicing uncomfortable truths suggests the administration may lack confidence in the transformative power of its own reforms. That is diminishing.

Nigeria’s problems are too serious for official defensiveness. Reform is a journey requiring constant feedback. The bishops fulfilled their civic and moral duty. The Presidency must perform its constitutional role by listening, not by silencing dissent.

Source: punchng.com

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Lifestyle

LACK OF TRUST IN MARRIAGE

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A marriage can survive difficult times, financial struggles, and disagreements—but when trust disappears, the relationship begins to lose its foundation.

When a husband no longer trusts his wife, or a wife no longer trusts her husband, even innocent actions can become suspicious. A simple phone call becomes a question. Coming home late becomes an accusation. A private conversation becomes a source of fear and jealousy.

Lack of trust creates emotional distance.

It produces constant suspicion, arguments, insecurity, resentment, and sometimes secretive behaviour. Instead of feeling safe with each other, couples begin to feel like enemies living under the same roof.

Trust is not built by controlling your spouse, checking their phone every minute, or constantly demanding explanations. Trust is built through honesty, faithfulness, transparency, consistency, and keeping your word.

If trust has been broken, don’t pretend everything is fine. Talk about it. Admit mistakes. Forgive where possible. Set healthy boundaries. And be willing to rebuild what has been damaged.

Remember: love may bring two people together, but trust helps keep them together.

💔 Don’t allow suspicion to destroy what communication and honesty can repair.

BUILD TRUST. BE FAITHFUL. BE HONEST. PROTECT YOUR MARRIAGE.

“Wherefore putting away lying, speak every man truth with his neighbour.”
— Ephesians 4:25 (KJV)

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Lifestyle

LACK OF OPENNESS IN MARRIAGE

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A marriage can look beautiful on the outside and still be struggling on the inside when there is no openness between husband and wife.

When couples stop communicating honestly, keep secrets, hide their feelings, or are afraid to discuss important issues, emotional distance begins to grow. What starts as “I don’t want to cause a problem” can eventually become mistrust, resentment, loneliness, and constant misunderstanding.

Openness does not mean telling your spouse everything in a hurtful or careless way. It means creating a safe relationship where both partners can honestly talk about their feelings, concerns, mistakes, finances, expectations, struggles, and dreams without fear of unnecessary humiliation or condemnation.

A strong marriage requires:

• Honest communication — Talk about problems instead of allowing them to grow in silence.
• Trust and transparency — Avoid unnecessary secrecy that can damage confidence in the relationship.
• Active listening — Listen to understand, not simply to respond or attack.
• Emotional vulnerability — Let your spouse know when you are hurting, worried, disappointed, or afraid.
• Respect — Honesty should never become an excuse for insults, threats, or emotional abuse.
• Forgiveness — When mistakes are acknowledged, work together toward healing and restoration.

The Bible says:

“Where no counsel is, the people fall: but in the multitude of counsellors there is safety.” — Proverbs 11:14 (KJV)

And:

“Let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath.” — James 1:19 (KJV)

Marriage should be a place where two people can feel safe enough to communicate, honest enough to admit their weaknesses, and humble enough to work through their differences.

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Don’t allow silence, secrets, and suspicion to build walls between you and your spouse. Talk. Listen. Understand. Forgive. Grow together.

❤️ Openness builds trust. Trust strengthens intimacy. And healthy communication helps build a stronger marriage.

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